I don’t deal with death well. I just don’t. I love people, and even if I have only known you for a short while, my heart aches if I lose you. So you can bet that my heart is busting out of my chest with hurt this morning as I received a phone call that a friend I have gone to school with since kindergarten died in a car accident late last night.
Just yesterday, I was creeping on his instagram thinking, Man, I haven’t seen him in a while, I miss that little nugget. And here I was, waking at 9am to a phone call that says that Clint Diaz had died in a car accident last night, along with four others.
I couldn’t wrap my mind around it. It still doesn’t seem real. And my first instinct was to start yelling at God and getting pissed at Him for taking such a young soul, who was so vibrant. I wanted to blame someone, and who better than the One who can take it right? People blame God all the times for bad things in this world. But through talking with close friends and thinking this morning, I have been reminded that we can’t blame God for bad things, because He is everything that is good. Therefore, He cannot be associated with these bad things that unfortunately happen. We can blame bad things such as death because of the fall, and sin, which we are all responsible for. Sin is a choice, and we all have made that choice to sin. So because of those choices, people unfortunately have to die.
But instead of looking to blame someone for the inevitable fact that sometimes bad things happen to good people, we should be focusing on the fact that the Lord, being good and faithful, has written us countless notes of encouragement and comforting words in His love letter to us, reminding us of His Sovereignty, and that He will be there for us during times of loss. He is not the cause of death and bad things, but He is the Ultimate Comforter, Counselor, Prince of Peace in these times, and He gives us hope.
So for those of you who are suffering from the loss of Clint Diaz, Eric Harrison, Amanda Starz, Andrew Duncan, and Julian Arredondo, or anyone else for that matter, I encourage you to take part in these things:
1) Mourn. | There is nothing wrong about grieving over lost loved ones in our lives. In fact Jesus encourages it as a healing process.
“Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.” (Matthew 5:4)
2) Feel what you feel, and be honest with God. | Feelings aren’t good or bad, they just are. We can’t control our feelings, but we can control the actions that come from those feelings. But regardless, the Lord doesn’t get angry with us for being angry at Him, or asking why, or not feeling okay. Whenever people tell me to be strong, I know they mean well, but sometimes it makes me want to slap them in the face. Because the Lord wants us to be honest with Him in our feelings so that He can minister to us in the best way possible. And if that means me falling weakly on my knees, and screaming at Him asking Him why or getting mad that He allowed these things to happen, then that’s what will happen. Like I said, the Lord can take our feelings, He is a big boy and can handle it. And in those moments, the Lord scoops you up, holds you and as he kisses your forehead, He whispers, “Daddy’s got you”.
“He will swallow up death forever; and the Lord God will wipe away tears from all faces,and the reproach of his people he will take away from all the earth,for the Lord has spoken.” (Isaiah 25:8)
“The Lord is near to the brokenheartedand saves the crushed in spirit.” (Psalm 34:18)
3) Pray. | As cliche as that probably sounds, because we hear this often whenever we go through trial or loss or grief, and it sometimes just becomes a phrase that people throw around to make themselves feel like they helped, Prayer is such a powerful tool. And when we are weak and can’t pray like we need to, or don’t know what to pray for in situations, we can be confident that the Holy Spirit Himself intercedes for us which is such an amazing and comforting fact. How much more powerful are our prayers when interceded by the Spirit? And The Spirit knows us, and the Lord uses all of these things to bring us closer to Himself and to accomplish His will.
26 Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words. 27 And he who searches hearts knows what is the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints according to the will of God. 28 And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.” (Romans 8:26-28)
My prayer for you reading this is that you will not blame God in suffering and loss, but rest in His grace and comfort, knowing that He will use bad things to bring good and ultimately share the good news of Jesus Christ, who sacrificed His life to bring us freedom from death and tragedy and pain and suffering. So rest in His love, and may the Lord bless you and keep you and give you peace as you face this dark time of life. In our weakness, He is strong.
“When we arrive at eternity’s shore, where death is just a memory and tears are no more, we’ll enter in as the wedding bells ring, Your bride will come together and we’ll sing, ‘You’re Beautiful.'” -Phil Wickham
****If you would like to read more encouraging verses about dealing with loss feel free to check them out here: http://encouragingbiblequotes.com/versescomforta.html